The King Say “Thank You” with a grin!
I remember loathing writing “Thank You” cards after every birthday and Christmas. The rote
“Dear [insert aging relative],
Thank you so much for my lovely [insert unwanted object].
It’s what I always wanted… blah blah blah.”
I never got to write the notes wanted…
“Dear Granddad,
I guess the Alzheimer’s has finally kicked in huh? What the hell made you think I wanted a neck tie printed with the royal crest of Norway? And even worse, what the hell made you buy it? Next year, you old coot, just give me the damned money like I asked for. If you’re still alive that is.”
It’s probably for the best that my mum supervised the note writing, I really was an angry young man.
But this all makes me think about the nature of Thank Yous. I remember the first time I was acknowledged on a manuscript. It was an excellent feeling. Obviously not as great as being an author, but I knew my minor contribution hadn’t warranted a place on the list, so an acknowledgement was fine. I loved it when our grad students defended their theses and my name was on the list at the end, or if my PI gave a talk and mentioned me and my project. This isn’t an ego trip, it’s just nice to know that your hard work has paid off and is…well…acknowledged.
But that’s an easy way to thank someone. You’re adding a name to a list. How do we thank people for the help they give when there’s nothing concrete like that?
I wrote on Lablit once about learning to network effectively. I put those “mad skillz” to use and recently managed to land myself two telephone “interviews”. One was with a senior administrator at a large research hospital in the north east, the other with an ex-senior editor of a major scientific journal (no prizes for guessing which one) who now works for a not-for profit company as their Director of Communications. Both are PhDs who are now applying their skills in positions far from the ones they (officially at least) trained for. They work in very different areas, but had many similarities in their journeys.
Both took time out of their extremely busy schedules to talk to me, tell me their stories and give me advice as I look to make my own move away from the lab bench. Both of them asked me to stay in touch and let them know how my personal journey progresses. There were offers of help along the way too, offers I’m sure I’ll take advantage of.
How do you thank someone for that?
The only way I can think of to show my respect is by working as hard as I can towards my new goals. I’ll show them I appreciate their support by succeeding in my new endevours. This is much better than a “Thank You” note, and much more fulfilling too.
How about cash?
Yes please.
I have a feeling (and it’s probably been verified by some study or other) that workers in any organization value being thanked by their superiors at least as much as a rise in status or even a pay increment. At Nature we always at least try to thank our referees, who work, unacknowledged, unpaid, and very, very hard – and without whom the whole publication edifice would crumble. Thank you, you shouldn’t have, it’s just what I always wanted, no, really.
While I’d go with Jen – large sums of money are a very welcome thank-you any time – when I still had a real job with a boss other than ‘er indoors, the most memorable reward I ever had was when I stayed very late completing a presentation. My boss wanted to thank me in a significant way, but hadn’t anticipated it, so scrabbled about the office and eventually solemnly presented me with a tea-bag, saying it was a stand-in ‘thank you’ until he could come with something better.
Interestingly, I can’t remember what the something better was, but the tea-bag still remains in the memory.
(Ironically, I didn’t drink tea at the time.)
Jenny: I’m a postdoc. I have no cash!
Richard: You’re welcome
Henry: Do y’all ever make an effort to visit referees at conferences or such like? Say thank you face-to-face? I guess that would be too much effort though (sheer numbers of people). Does nature do a “Thanks to our reviewers” suppliment like JNeurosci?
Brian: During my PhD I was having trouble generating transgenic flies, and I think my PI had written that aprt of my project off. Then one day i got one… beautiful transgenic orange eyes. It was dead in less than 24hrs. most times someone published or did well there was champagne to celebrate. He gave me a 12oz bottle of beer…
Do y’all ever make an effort to visit referees at conferences or such like? Say thank you face-to-face?
Yes.
As a humble scientist, I would love for anyone anywhere in the system to say, thank you for doing what you love to do anyhow, coming up with creative hypotheses and even more creative ways of testing them. I am thinking of the many administrators who look down the ends of their noses at me because I can not locate a receipt from the reimbursement I had submitted eight months before that they themselves have misplaced; or those who tell me that I am finally allowed to spend a 10K euro grant for the year as of November 1st – but accounts close on November 15th. I don’t dare dream of the gratitude of publishers who are able to create jobs and even internships for countless people as a result of my sort of work.
The best jobs, like parenthood, are thankless. I’ve pretty much come to terms with it.
You wrote: The only way I can think of to show my respect is by working as hard as I can towards my new goals. That reminds me of my mom’s saying, Living well is the best revenge.
It doesn’t prevent you from re-contacting your former mentors once you have achieved some modicum of success and/or a little time has passed. It’s gratifying for both parties.
Henry: Are you ill? That’s a level of brevity I don’t expect! But it’s really nice to hear it. Must be a lot of work :/
Heather: Now you sound like my PI :) I’m still in semi-regular contact with one of my mentors and he is a bit sad that I’m leaving the bench. He wanted to recruit me cos they need more Drosophilists who can patch-clamp. Could have been a nice RA fellowship too… ho hum. None of the decisions are easy are they?