Well, friends, I see that the effluvia of time are rapidly fast approaching coming up to the eructation of fortune, and the grand colloquium known as Cromer Is So Bracing ’09 is just days away.
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I, Editor by Henry Gee
This is the Nature Network and therefore Terribly Extremely Very Serious foothold for Nature Senior Editor Henry Gee. If you want fun and games, visit http://cromercrox.blogspot.com/
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Cromer Curtain-Raiser
- Date:
- Tuesday, 24 Feb ruary 2009 - 16:02 UTC
The latest weather forecast for Cromer looks good – sunny intervals, balmy temperatures (i.e. not actually freezing) and winds that lack so much in violence that no camel need be harmed in the prosecution of such prognostications, and earlier portents of DOOM
need not apply. Ideal conditions, then, for us to make our projected Oscar-threatening short film
The Director, a Mr G. S., of Glasgow, will arrive on Friday morning to be collected from Norwich International Airport by Unicycling Girrafes Taxis
so we can spend the day
scoopingpoopingscoping out possible locations, such as the Jardin Des Girrafes
which is popular with makers of films about the Western Front; and the Maison Des Girrafes Beach-Front
condofield stationhut.
Which would be great for the Galapagos Islands, in fact, better, because we can make restorative cups of tea in it. The props department still has, however, to put in a bit more work on the giant tortoises:
and we have yet to resolve a minor industrial dispute among the support staff.
We’ll then convene in the early evening at the Cliftonville Hotel
and go in search of fish’n’chips. The Cliftonville will be the venue from 10.30-ish Saturday Morning for the knitting of invertebrates and the scripting of the film. On Sunday we shall shoot the epic, and on Monday we shall disperse…
Well, that’s the plan, but in North Norfolk, pretty much anything is possible
And usually is.
For those of a more remote disposition, Mr G. S. of Glasgow has set up a FriendFeed room, and Karen James has fixed it that anything on a publicly available Twitter account containing the text #CISB will end up there. Mr Steel also plans to stream bits and pieces of CISB to this live feed, so tune in, one and all.
Looking forward to the
ensuing chaosevent immensely.Last updated: Tuesday, 24 Feb 2009 - 16:02 UTC
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Comments
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I like to think of CISB as Cromer International Science Blogging.
I say, steady on, Frank. That might be going a bit far. However, Li-Kim has, as I write, come round with some pretty decent freebies for the delegates.
Henry, if I can find a way to get them to you, would it be possible to feature the knitted Darwin and Galapagos tortoise in the film?
Some kind of crappy stop-motion (Alfred Russel) Wallace and Gromit?
Send ’em along, Matt!!!
Good luck, Henry. Goldie and I will be with you in spirit (but perhaps a touch warmer) here in sunny Wiltshire.
Looking forward to the event immensely, Henry. In fact, given the travel time from Aberystwyth I should probably already have left! :-)
Wow, Freebies too!
Good luck organisators and particularly to the attendinees. Hope you have a blast.
But just remember, there is an alternative design for the merchandise.
Wasn’t there also a rumour of a staging of Brian’s epic Christmas poem?
Oh goodness. I missed that great versification before.
Gosh. I’d forgotten about that. And if we can get a piano on to the beach I can do a nude scene as Ivor Cutler, and John can emerge ragged and mad-eyed from the sea and shout “it’s!” before collapsing. Or not.
I have a video that was shot on a beach on a film project week I did in grade 9, but I seem to have deleted it from YouTube. I was going to show it as inspiration, but I guess I’ll have to re-upload it somewhere. It had behind the scenes stuff with lots of giggling and 14-year-old me in a nun costume. It was based on a script I wrote, and the plot was: A lighthouse guard sees two suspicious tourists on the beach, and quickly bikes to the church to ask the nun for help. The nun offers a cookie, and due to her delay, the lighthouse guard’s bike is now stolen, they RUN to the beach, and just catch the tourists in the middle of the heinous crime of…burying garbage on the beach! FIGHT SCENE!! The tourists are arrested and thrown in jail.
Yes, I should upload that again…
Yup. Good script ideas. Especially the part about the nun.
Since the remixed version of the wonderful NN Poem read by Mr
BarryBrian Clegg is buried in thepile of dungmidst of another thread, here is it again. And yes, let’s (CISB-er’s) record this on Cromer Beach.—
Some of the “live action” from Cromer this weekend will be taking place here and , we’ll upload the “serious” video on da web laters.
@ Graham – would you mind sending Karen James the highest-res version you’ve got of the CISB logo? She’d like to print some T-shirts!
Eva:
swoon
Shame there’s not many hills in Cromer. How about The dunes are alive …
Frank, be careful what you wish for. Cromer is actually quite hilly…
I expect to arrive in Cromer at 15.30 on Friday, unless the ticket agent at Cambridge is playing a horrible joke on a Texan, or if I miss a connection in Norwich. I’m hoping to bequeath some yarn and beads to the Maison des Girrafes, as I have Been Shopping. Oops.
I brought the warmer, drier weather from south Texas btw; hope everyone is enjoying it.
swoon
FOURTEEN!!
@ Graham – would you mind sending Karen James the highest-res version you’ve got of the CISB logo? She’d like to print some T-shirts!
Done, before I had to-reboot – aarrg.
I expect to arrive in Cromer at 15.30 on Friday
By then I shall have parked Graham at the Cliftonville and be engaged on that salmon-like event they call ‘the school run’. However, what time to you arrive in Norwich?
@Eva: don’t worry about Mike. I’m sure he’s quite safe. And Finnish winters do that to a man.
I arrive in Norwich at 14.30. Should I take a later train to Cromer than the 14.45, such that my arrival doesn’t coincide with the school run? I can get tea and go to the newsagent – I’m enjoying proper newspapers here, and I can get a copy of Private Eye or Horse and Hound. Print media are not dead to me, and reading my iPhone gives me a headache. I was born in the wrong century, apparently.
Alternatively, I can walk to the Cliffonville from the Cromer station….
Umm, yeah. What Henry says. {scurries away in trench coat peering over shoulder}.
@ Kristi: I shall arrive at Norwich station to meet you from your 14:30 arrival and
whiskcarry you off to Cromer, just in time to collect Gees Minor and Minima. Mr Steel might well be with me, or he might not.Norwich Station has a cafe and a newspaper shop!
This applies to anyone else who might be loitering at Norwich Station at the time, of course.
@ Mike: Goodbye binoculars and mackintosh – everything is just great.
Cheers, Henry – I hope the Evolvo has a capacious boot, as I have a largish rolling duffel bag and a backpack. Apart from that, I don’t look particularly out of place here in England. Rather less than in San Antonio, I suspect.
My only film experience is with stop motion animation, from making a version of the battle of the Alamo, in middle school. We used jointed paper puppets.
@ Kristi – Caroline the Evolvo is a big old-fashioned sedan with a boot that swallows luggage, so no problems there.
@ Everyone – here are some more domestic details.
FRIDAY: In the morning I’ll collect Mr G. S. from Norwich airport and then we’ll go to Cromer to
walk the dogdo some location-scouting. In the early p.m. I shall collect Kristi from Norwich rail station. If you haven’t already done so, please let me know of your travel arrangements, in case Maison Des Girrafes Taxis™ can collect you.Then I shall deposit people at the Cliftonville while I collect the Offspring from School, and we’ll meet at the Cliftonville reception at 6pm and go and find some fish and chips. (Frank will be arriving too late fior this, unfortunately).
SATURDAY – we’ll meet in the Cliftonville Ballroom at 10.30 where coffee will be served, and work hard on the script for CROMER: Darwin’s Lost Weekend. A buffet lunch will be served at 12.30 (mixed sandwiches with salad and crisps, sausage rolls and scotch eggs). We can continue working on the script after that. We can have Kristi’s workshop in the late afternoon (the Gees Minor and Minima should be around by then … they are doing somethiong else in the morning).
Saturday evening is free. We can decide what we want to do at the time. But all are welcome at the Maison Des Girrafes to hang out (location details in a minute).
SUNDAY we’ll be shooting the film. During that time the Maison Des Girrafes can be a base (the internet connection is better from there than from the CLiftonville). On Sunday night Karen will be lodging on our sofa, but we have plenty of floorspace and camping mats in case anyone else wants to crash out with Heidi…
The Maison Des Girrafes is at 89 Connaught Road, NR27 0DB. Just key the postcoade into a program such as streetmap and you’ll find it. It’s a 15-20 minute walk from Cromer town centre but of course M des Gs Taxis will be available. Kristi – bring your materials for those who aren’t filming!
CORRECTION We’ll move Friday’s bar meet-up with fish’n’chips to 7.30pm so John Gilbey can join in.
Will you all still be in a drinking mood at 10.30pm when I hope to be arriving?
Err, I’m Scottish, so yup.
As a fellow Scot, I feel secure in saying Graham would probably still be in a drinking mood at 10.30 am. What else would you pour on yer porridge on a frosty morning?
Sounds like it is brewing up to be quite a party! I’ll try and get an earlier train to avoid delaying people in their hunt for F&C – more news as we get it…
After the fish’n’chips I’ll have to take Gee Minor and Gee Minima home (I’m being a house-husband on Friday, as Mrs Gee has an important meeting that day in connection with her Tar and Feather business) but that shouldn’t stop general browsing and sluicing until the wee hours for those who want to do that sort of thing. There are lots of
hostilitieshostelries in Cromer of which the most salubrious is the Red Lion, but there are quite a few which are – how can one put it – more lively, and there is, unbelievably, a night club.I should be around for partying on the Saturday, though.
Ah, will there be an alternative late night number to call for up-to-the-minute information on the whereabouts of the CISB
binge drinkersdelegates?I’m sure Graham might be persuaded to vouchsafe his phone number …
On Friday night I have to forgoe the Fish ‘n’ Chips, alas.
Over the weekend I am going to stay in Norwich with my brother. He tells me that on Friday night he is compering a cabaret with his theatre group. I shall watch and learn, and join you on Saturday brimming with ideas. (I’m sure I can arrange for us to gatecrash the cabaret, which is repeated on Saturday, should that be the preferred arrangement.)
We look forward to seeing you Erika! Maison Des Girrafes Taxis could arrange a Saturday-night trip to the Cabaret if that’s what people wanted :)
Apologies for not mentioning this earlier, but Graham has designated ‘CISB09’ as a flickr search tag to allow photos of the event to be aggregated in the same place on flickr. This isn’t compulsory, but it might prove useful were we to blog/friendfeed about this later.
@ John, Ah, will there be an alternative late night number to call for up-to-the-minute information on the whereabouts of the CISB binge drinkers delegates?
Well, you might want to start with 999. Other than that, John, I’ll send you a PM with my mob. no. in a sec.
@Mike, As a fellow Scot, I feel secure in saying Graham would probably still be in a drinking mood at 10.30 am.
My
local shopkeepers and pub landlordslegal team have suggested that you refrain from making such comments, in public. I’ll have you know, I’ve only done the 10.30 am shift once, after my 18th – NEVER AGAIN !!@ Kristi, I’ll still be with The Gee at 14.30, so we’ll see you then.
You might see Heidi, too. She quite likes a ride in the car.
Oops, @ John should of course have been, @ Frank..
Well, funnily enough my real first name is John so I was wondering how does he know my name is John?
And cunningly enough, Frank’s REAL surname is actually Major, according to my sources. OMG, I’ve just sent a PM to an ex-PM of the UK
Secret ServiceGovernment. WOW.I think your sources are most definitely wrong. Oh yes.
That’s what I thought, Frank.
Steel adjusts the placing of his sauces and sources contact jars. Such an easy mistake to make.
Pipe down, Gents.
@ Kristi – many apologies, but I can’t collect you from Norwich Station at 14.30 – I just won’t be able to get back to Cromer in time to collect the kids. Many apologies!!! Can you revert to Plan A?
“You might see Heidi, too. She quite likes a ride in the car.”
Off topic, but… can you believe that the city towed my friend’s truck yesterday – with his dog in it? It took him about an hour to get to the impound lot, and the poor thing was absolutely terrified. He’d only popped in to a client’s place for a few minutes, the window was open, bowl of water inside, but still…
That’s awful! I reckon your friend has grounds for complaint.
That’s what I said… he’s looking into it.
News FLASH – Bora, who visited the Maison Des Girrafes last Spring (really, we should have a blue plaque on the sofa saying BORA SLEPT HERE) has trailed CISB09 on his blog. Listen up, folks – the blogosphere will be watching our every move. So behave yourselves.
No worries, Henry! By Plan A I assume you mean that I take the 15.45 train from Norwich, rather than the 14.45. Arriving in Cromer at 16.36 then.
Er… whatever plan you had before I volunteered my services… If you arrive at 14.30 in Norwich, I guess you can take the 14.45 train which gets in at 15.36.
That was indeed the initial plan. If that coincides with the school run, and I see no Evolvo upon emerging from Cromer station, I’ll walk to the Cliftonville. I’ve been walking a lot since I arrived in the UK, and really, it’s been wonderful.
Merchandising News
Steel and James Enterprises plc have created souvenir CISB09 T-shirts
Order yours here
And if that weren’t enough, Karen has also been digging into the fascinating history of the image we’ve pilfered. Thanks, Karen!
An odd question, but how is Skegness pronounced? The way it’s written? (I don’t even expect phonetic spelling anymore from a nation with lieutenants and Worcestershire sauce.)
‘Arsewarbler’
Go and catch that plane, will you? And stand up straight. They’ll never let you into blighty with posture like that.
‘Skegness’ is pronounced as it looks, though if you are a statistician you can pronounce it ‘Skewness’. The English place name that causes most chortles and guffaws among the locals watching colonials trying to pronounce it is ‘Loughborough’ which comes out as ‘Loobaroo’ or ‘Looga-Barooga’, when it is actually pronounced ‘Milton Keynes’.
Norfolk has a few placenames designed to fool the unwary, such as ‘Costessey’ (pronounced ‘cossy’, to rhyme with ‘bossy’); Stiffkey (pronounced ‘Stukey’, but only by those over 50), ‘Happisburgh’ (pronounced ‘Hazeboro’) and ‘Kings Lynn’ (pronounced ‘rectal prolapse’).
Reminds me of the story of the Hungarian tourist whose anxiety about the correct pronounciation of English had him book the next train home after seeing this theatre notice:
Noel Coward’s Cavalcade – Pronounced Success!
I’m desperately wanting to say something about Scunthorpe, but I don’t dare.
Milngavie near Glasgow is pronounced Mull-guy. Every newcomer is ridiculed at least once for pronouncing it wrong, protests loudly – and then ridicules the next person who says Mill-ne-gav-ee.
@ Frank – I have absolutely no idea what you mean. Might you elucidate?
I dare not.
I won’t tell anyone else. Promise.
Right. Scunthorpe isn’t necessarily the funniest place name in the world. There’s Mittelfart in Denmark, and North Piddle in Worcestershire for starters.
Not far from here are the Snorings – Great Snoring and Little Snoring, quiet little Norfolk villages where nothing ever happens. Except that Little Snoring has an airfield.
Don’t worry about Mittelfart1, Danes laugh at Grimsby which means “ugly town” in Danish.
Frank – I’m sure anything you say about Scunthorpe (a) will have been said before, and (b) won’t be as bad as my descriptions of the place.
1 The place I worked in in Denmark had a lift from the basement for heavy stuff, with a plaque on it describing it as a “godsfart”.
Bob – I never claim originality. I specialise in re-use.
Frank graham here – writing on kristi’s iPhone . Power adapter for my mobile is shagged. Kristi’s no. Is 0012102875028. Please confirm that you have read this
OK, I have that, thanks.
So have I. And Erika texted me to say she’ll be with us tomorrow. Karen is poorly and might not get here. I have sent goodwill messages and cyber-hugs on behalf of all of us.