Anyone else remember Free to Be… You and Me?
That makes me think that I recently received another request for money from St. Jude Children’s Hospital, where tokens in memory of a friend’s untimely death were directed, and I noticed yesterday that it was signed by Marlo Thomas. A worthy cause, but a little heavy on the God Bless You and so forth for my comfort. Still, her wording and implication are quite justified given its history. And when you read the sob stories that are supposed to wring money from your wallet – they do bring tears to your eyes.
Contrary to expectations, perhaps, crying and depression do not seem to have much to do with one another. Nor do crying and premenstrual syndrome, apparently.
Jonathan Rottenberg and Ad Vingerhoets among others, have been doing work for a while on exactly what crying does for you. They have published on how crying is both a distress signal and a way of “getting it out of your system”.
My husband just finds it manipulative when I cry, or proof of a generally hysterical attitude. (It’s the one bit of sexism that I find in him.) But he’s not alone in judging a crying person negatively.
There is an interesting radio transcript along the same lines here. And a recent publication by our two heros blogged about here.
I’d like to ask Dr. Rottenberg if “respiratory sinus arrhythmia” is actually just wet sniffling?
Crying? All it does is annoy people and release sad hormones that stay with you for days and keep you on edge.
I know because I am an expert.
I cry more during the Olympics than at any other time… I’m still not be much of a sad crier, although it does seem to happen more often as I get older. You’d expect the reverse, really.
I dont mind the happy crying but I do prefer to avoid the sad crying!
I have observed that if I am sad or angry and dont cry the feeling passes fairly quickly. If crying is involved the sadness sticks around. Hence, my theory about the crying hormones… Cant think of what it would be good for.
I was so relieved that Hillary clinton teared and gained votes. I can be president after all.
I cry when I hear Wild West Hero by ELO. And when I drop a
basket of guinea pigsstilson wrench on my foot.I like a good cry every once in awhile. Alone preferrable, in front of a movie or a book… and then I’m good to go.
I am intrigued by the links about the research on what really goes on… I’ve always just assumed it’s a pressure realise – but I understand if it’s just a theory of mine ;)
Q. I cry when I hear Wild West Hero by ELO
A. Answers on the back of a jam jar cover to this chap:-
Meaning that those outside the detailed mindset of Dr Gee have enquiring, err, minds.
Hhmm, sorry Hendy, if you don’t want to cry please look away now and make jam/chutney bla bla:-
You’re making me cry. sob
@Graham, please would you abide by the Flickr terms and conditions? Ta.
(I have no problem with that photo being shared but Flickr have guidelines )
Bad enough to be a woman who cries… but imagine what it’s like for us men with incontinent tear ducts! It really is not acceptable for a man to be seen crying in polite society.
It took me a lot of theraoy to get to the point where I could accept my crying, and even then I still have a strong feeling that others see crying as a sign of weakness rather than a natural sign of an emotional life.
I have the urge to make a nice cuppa tea for Pamela, Asa and Frank. Maybe it’s because my kettle is boiling as I type.
No tea for Bob though, who according to this match report is adding to my woes today:
“The game was effectively over four minutes later when Coloccini ignored the golden rule of defending and passed the ball square across the front of his penalty area towards Taylor.
Taylor tried to let the ball run across his body and away from danger but O’Hara intercepted and, with plenty of time and space, the Spurs midfielder slotted the ball clinically past Given."
@Cath> who likes the Spurs anyway? And the game was Newcastle (good beer) and Spurs
ehh… I’ll take that back since it is not my game at all. Sorry. Have been caught up in american football and missing hockey for a while now. sorry.
And Cath, I’d love some tea.
One lump or two?
@Frank – Bad enough to be a woman who cries…
But tonight Frank (nice to see you earlier at the TalkScience event), it’ll just be tears of joy as you gaze lovingly at your new
toycomputer…? Enjoy!@Cathy – in the throat?
@Åsa – now, you want to convert to rugby at some point. Emotions and crying by all encouraged (despite what the New Zealanders want to make you believe).
© Rui Palha
Heather> well you have the
sexyvery successful team from Paris in the rugby. I think I saw some photos and nearly cried…end sexist comments
I think converting might be easier when I leave the States since it seems to be a bigger sport in the UK/Commonwealth/Europe. But sure enough, I like the idea of less padding and protection and more strange rules as “everyone in a circle trying to get forward while the ball is in the middle”
The first time I took my now-husband back to the UK with me, my Mum decided to show him her calendar of nude French rugby players… over dinner. He didn’t know what to say, which is fair enough really.
Cath> That’s the calender I’m thinking about. Somehow they manage to pull it off a bit…. ;) Still quite evil to put him on the spot like that over dinner though…. giggles
He was OK after my Dad introduced him to his Scotch collection.
calendar of nude French rugby players
Is it true they have funny-shaped balls?
(groans)
I remember when the first Dieux du Stade calendar came out – it was a hit in my mostly female lab – but Asa’s right; it plays into pretty sexist mores and I’d be a little put out to see the equivalent female calendar up in my now mostly-male lab.
I used to like single-malt Scotch about ten years ago but after tasting a glass of Midleton Very Rare can no longer get quite as excited about the Lagavulins and Isles of Jura, as lovely as they are.
Brought tears to my eyes, it did.