This one is for the non-academics among us; those of us who have a son or daughter, a brother or sister, a granddchild, a barista, or a next-door neighbor who is in grad school.
Every time I go home for a holiday, one of my relatives will ask me this question: “So when are you going to graduate?” My reply is always the same: “Oh, when I finish my thesis.” And then I usually add, in a rushed manner so as not to seem like I’m being curt, “These things usually take five or six years… you know how it is,” and change the subject to football or something.
People: I beg you, do not ask a grad student when they are going to finish grad school. It’s like asking someone how much money they make, or when they’re going to start having kids— you just don’t do it. I’m not dodging the draft; I really am doing the best I can to get out as fast as possible. Making just over $20,000 a year (while living in New York City) is indeed awesome, but I’m pretty sure I don’t want my grandmother, whose only source of income is Social Security, to continue to outearn me for the rest of my life. It’s cool; I’m happy. Science takes time. Now let’s talk about how the Eagles are going to fall short in the postseason once again this year.
There’s a really old PhD comic about this.
My parent’s neighbors asked me for ten years every time I met them when I would finish high school. Even after I had a PhD. No kidding. So don’t think much about it, it doesn’t mean anything except a try to find a topic to talk about.
LOL that’s a great comic and post. Now about those Eagles… nice job on the Cowboys. That was a truly magical performance to watch…
I get asked how the course is going. I’m now faculty ;-)
I think UK PhDs are of more fixed length so we were less likely to be asked when we were graduating. Still, I can see why it would be ‘upsetting’!