Here’s a poster that’s recently appeared on the Norwich Road, just at the end of my street.
We take higher education very seriously here in Norfolk.
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The End Of The Pier Show
Described by Carl Zimmer as "one of my favorite wastes of time", The End Of The Pier Show is the online scratching post of Nature Editor, Norfolk resident and sometime "garage-band monster" Henry Gee and his amazing unicycling girrafes.
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Education To The Nation
- Date:
- Friday, 09 May 2008 - 13:40 GMT
Last updated: Friday, 09 May 2008 - 13:40 GMT
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Comments
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A friend of mine who went there claims that UEA = University of Easy Access.
Could be worse though. During my time at Newcastle University it was rumoured that the newly Universitized (note the z, Richard) Northumbria Uni was originally going to be called the City University of Newcastle upon Tyne.
Yeah, but is she a model or the real McCoy, Henry? I would feel cheated if she weren’t bona fide – and with a town the size of Cromer I don’t imagine you could get away with faking it.
(P.s. Cath….shhh. Don’t get Richard started on the whole zed thing – he’s only just calmed down.)
Richard? Calmed down? Sounds unlikely.
Me, I’m still trying to work out who the person in the picture is. Any clues, Henry?
Yes, she’s a real person, allegedly – a Cromerian who’s got ahead in life by studying something or other at UEA. (The white squiggles on the picture are my crude attempt to remove all details, which I thought only fair, as I was posting the picture online).
Henry, you must have seen this site at some stage. But just in case you haven’t:
http://www.cynicalbastards.com/ubs/
Henry – While we are on finer details of the English language are they really called Cromerians? They sound more like bit players in the Galactic Empire.
You’re all going to be sorry in August. Just watch it.
Cath, I remember something about that!! Wasn’t it not spotted (good English there huh?) until they had the letterhead printed or something?
And Cromerians ruling the galaxy? Well with Henry’s penchant for pangalactic-sci-opera, I wouldn’t be too surprised…
That was the story! I was never sure how much was true and how much was inter-University rivalry.
I must say that the poster does seem a little, um, provincial: “Go to university, 20 miles away from home”. Norfolk has enough of a reputation as it is.
This is not to say that the UEA isn’t a fine university – they even gave me a PhD.
Cath & Ian, I think it must be an urban legend… because I heard it was Cambridge University Netball Team.
I do, however, have a paper somewhere in my office from a chinese lab, which describes some sort of Copper Nuclear Transporter. How the reviewers manages not to piss themselves laughing I don’t know.
@David – that website is priceless. It reminds me of a running joke I had with a fried about the University of Neasden, which went in for highly vocational courses backed up by aggressively industrial sponsorship. My friend came up with the ‘Tesco Chair of One-Stop Shopping Provision’ which I thought rather good.
It also reminds me of a phone conversation I once had with John Maddox, former editor of Nature.
“I’m going to visit the University of Deleted,” he said.
“I’ve never heard of the University of Deleted”, quoth I.
“It’s at the very bottom of the University League tables,” he said.
“So, you’re going to raise the tone of it, are you?”
“Something like that.”
@Ian: I’m not sure what the residents of Cromer call themselves. I’ve never heard the term ‘Cromerian’ in that context – that was my own invention and a sly palaeontological pun. As for SF, you’re getting confused with Croutons, Dr Who’s staunchest adversaries.
@Bob: I thought so, too – the provinciality, I mean (UEA is of course a fine place, as I know from experience). When I was 16 and thinking of where I might go to University, my Mother advised ‘as far away from home as possible’. I think she had visions of my coming home every five minutes with armfuls of laundry.
Richard – it is a fact that the photo a friend of mine had taken, after getting her half-blue award for Netball, clearly said Cambride University Women’s Netball Team.
Half-blue? She was lucky. I played Scrabble for Cambridge U and couldn’t even get a quarter-blue.
Henry,
Me thinks you could do with some tips on Photoshop.
There’s a great 10 part series You Suck at Photoshop
Go check.
Henry – Its also well known that the only quarter-blue was in tiddly-winks.
I knew about tiddly-winks. Thos of us in the scrabble club were most indignant that you could tiddle your wink for a quarter but get diddly squat for JONQUILS running over two triple-word scores. Or, in my case, ADDAX, which, when I played it, got challenged by the Lady Bracknell I played in the town-v-gown match. Ah, happy days.
Well, maybe she is, in fact, Dr Who’s latest companion: a sort of
CromagnonCromergan- Cromerian time-traveller (a useful skill for those 20 miles).blast, the strike-outs did not work and ruined my feeble attempt at a joke.
I came very close to getting a half-blue for…
Backgammon.
I joined the Uni Backgammon club and won all my games … the day after they’d finalized the team for the Varsity match. The Captain was quite gutted.
I have a friend who really did get a half-blue, for…..table tennis.
All this talk about fractions of blue have prompted me to make a blog entry
As a postscript, check out this story for the kinds of league-table-warping shenanigans that go on (it is alleged) in various universities.