• Can I be a friend of myself?

      Sunday, 27 Apr 2008 - 23:20 GMT

      I merely ask this philosophical question, because I am humbled to find that I have 2013 friends. I have applied for membership of the Friends of Charles Darwin, and if accepted I may become CD, FCD. Membership is free, which is an improvement on the Royal Society. I have just received a most impudent letter from them insisting that if I continue to sign myself Charles Darwin FRS, I must pay my subscriptions backdated to 1881.

      Better yet, the Friends of Charles Darwin has some sound advice for my continuing education.

      Last updated: Sunday, 27 Apr 2008 - 23:20 GMT

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      • Comments

        • Date:
          Sunday, 27 Apr 2008 - 23:28 GMT
          Richard Grant said:

          I must pay my subscriptions backdated to 1881.

          Perhaps you should open a Paypal account and we could all contribute?

        • Date:
          Monday, 28 Apr 2008 - 05:16 GMT
          Bob O'Hara said:

          I would suggest you be careful advertising that you’re “a friend of yourself”. Some religious folk might interpret it the wrong way.

          I’m proud to be one of your friends already (I was about no. 700). Amongst your many other friends, you may wish to pay a visit to Carl Beull, an excellent illustrator of extinct (and extant) animals.

        • Date:
          Monday, 28 Apr 2008 - 06:19 GMT
          Scott Keir said:

          I believe you also owe all 2013 friends Christmas and Birthday cards – though perhaps as they have failed to send you yours for the last few years, perhaps you could all agree to call it off?

        • Date:
          Monday, 28 Apr 2008 - 08:27 GMT
          Maxine Clarke said:

          When you have finished paying your debts to the Royal Society there is the small matter of your outstanding subscription to the august organ journal Nature, since 4 November 1869, plus interest. A tidy sum that will keep many an impoverished editor from a pauper’s grave after burnout and being thrown on the scrap-heap retirement.

        • Date:
          Monday, 28 Apr 2008 - 10:31 GMT
          Bob O'Hara said:

          Mr. Darwin – I suggest you find yourself a good lawyer, and chase up those image rights. You could start by seeing how many times Nature Publishing Group has used your photograph.

        • Date:
          Monday, 28 Apr 2008 - 11:48 GMT
          Maxine Clarke said:

          Etching, surely, Dr Bob?

        • Date:
          Monday, 28 Apr 2008 - 12:24 GMT
          Bob O'Hara said:

          What? Is Nature so primitive it hasn’t discovered photography yet? :-)

        • Date:
          Tuesday, 29 Apr 2008 - 06:39 GMT
          Maxine Clarke said:

          Classic, Bob, that’s us.

        • Date:
          Tuesday, 29 Apr 2008 - 06:55 GMT
          Richard Grant said:

          Like a fine wine.

          Or cheese…

        • Date:
          Tuesday, 29 Apr 2008 - 07:01 GMT
          Maxine Clarke said:

          Well, we ain’t smelly, at least. Apart from a certain editor’s feet, which are frequently to be spotted, Hobbit-style, on his desk. Winter is not too bad, but summer….

        • Date:
          Tuesday, 29 Apr 2008 - 12:10 GMT
          Charles Darwin said:

          Feet on the desk? Such things would never do in Capt Fitzroy’s cabin. Bedlam is come again.

        • Date:
          Tuesday, 29 Apr 2008 - 12:15 GMT
          Richard Grant said:

          Oh come on. We’ve heard all about those Navy types.

        • Date:
          Tuesday, 29 Apr 2008 - 12:39 GMT
          Henry Gee said:

          Dear Mr Darwin

          I should like to clarify the remarks of a colleague, Dr Clarke, who notes inter alia that ”... apart from a certain editor’s feet, which are frequently to be spotted, Hobbit-style, on his desk.”

          After certain indelicate remarks made about my footwear in another place by a person rightly transported to New South Wales for the crime of punctuational terrorism, I have vowed, by way of defiance, to wear crocs sans socks from now until the clocks go back. Crocs are rather like clogs, but made of plastic, which is, I suppose, a distant cousin of bitumen or petroleum, only injection-moulded … oh never mind. back to the transformation notebooks with you. I remain,

          Your servant,

          Dr Henry Gee.

          PS Are you quite sure you’re not Jewish?

        • Date:
          Tuesday, 29 Apr 2008 - 15:42 GMT
          Charles Darwin said:

          I am moderately certain that crocs are made when a daddy crocodylidae gives a mummy crocodylidae a special hug.

        • Date:
          Tuesday, 29 Apr 2008 - 18:55 GMT
          Henry Gee said:

          Only if they are plastic crocodiles. Your taxonomic usage, Mr Darwin, is shocking. I think you might be a modern imposter.

        • Date:
          Tuesday, 29 Apr 2008 - 21:14 GMT
          Charles Darwin said:

          It was you, sir, who said that crocs are like dogs!

        • Date:
          Tuesday, 29 Apr 2008 - 21:15 GMT
          Charles Darwin said:

          Sorry. Your wrote clogs. My cataracts are playing up.

        • Date:
          Wednesday, 30 Apr 2008 - 09:16 GMT
          Henry Gee said:

          I’d recommend extreme hydrotherapy administered by sadistic Yorkshiremen. Either that or extended periods of rest in darkened rooms. What’s that? You do these things already?


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